Skip to product information
1 of 16

Thank Me For My Service Scumbag shirt

Thank Me For My Service Scumbag shirt

Regular price $25.00 USD
Regular price Sale price $25.00 USD
Sale Sold out
Step into the spotlight with a tee that commands attention and respect — and maybe a double-take. This isn't just a t-shirt; it's a bold statement, wrapped in a cozy sheath of audacity and comfort. It’s the tee that says, “Thank me for my service, scumbag,” with a cheeky wink and nod to over-the-top military bravado.

Here's the lowdown on the gear that'll make you the most huggably confrontational person in the room:

Fabric Composition: Crafted with 100% combed and ring-spun cotton to cushion your torso in comfort, while delivering a clear message to all the scumbags (also known as your friends) out there. The heather varieties add just a touch of polyester for that ‘blended’ approach to life.

Ash Tactics: The Ash color option stays nearly pure with 99% cotton but tosses in 1% polyester because, let's face it, nobody's perfect.

Heather Maneuvers: The Heather colors know how to play the field, mixing cotton and polyester like a well-orchestrated drill routine.

Physical Training Ready: Athletic and Black Heather are there for those who like their humor with a side of hustle, made with 90% cotton to absorb the blood, sweat, and tears of laughter.

Prism Precision: Heather Prism colors come in with a strategic 99% cotton for maximum comfort and 1% polyester because every shirt needs a little flexibility.

Lightweight Armor: Weighing in at 4.2 oz (142 g/m2), this shirt is the lightweight mail of the modern jester-warrior.

Battle-Ready Build: Pre-shrunk fabric means you'll retain your fit, no matter how many ‘thank yous' you battle through.

Structural Soundness: Side-seamed construction keeps you looking sharp and sleek, with no flapping flanks.

Shoulder-to-Shoulder Defense: Complete with shoulder taping because every part of a shirt should show up and stand up for service.

When you don this tee, you’re not just wearing a piece of clothing — you’re donning a suit of satirical armor, ready to charge into your day with the comfort and confidence of a hero who doesn’t need to say it twice. So wear it out, make 'em laugh, and maybe, just maybe, they’ll thank you for your service. They probably won't, though. Scumbags.

Size guide

  LENGTH (inches) WIDTH (inches) CHEST (inches)
XS 27 16 ½ 31-34
S 28 18 34-37
M 29 20 38-41
L 30 22 42-45
XL 31 24 46-49
2XL 32 26 50-53
3XL 33 28 54-57
4XL 34 30 58-61
5XL 35 31 62-65
View full details

“They’ve made a lot of fun of me, and I’ve enjoyed every bit of it.”

James Mattis, former Secretary of Defense